PMQs as-it-happens
11:50 – The leaders are back for PMQs. I have to dash off immediately after the session so bear in mind that every single typo I do in the next 40 minutes will be corrected not by me, but by an esteemed colleague. Yes, that means you get not only factual and grammatical inaccuracies, but the certainty of someone else's inconvenience. The world just got a little lighter. Kick off is at midday.
11:59 – The chamber is mostly full. And we have started on time. It's a miracle.
12:01 – Justin Tomlinson (Con, sends himself to sleep) asks about job losses at Honda, as if being forced by his mum to do a presentation for the class.
12:02 – Tories mock Miliband with a massive cheer as he gets up. Miliband asks Cameron if he thinks today's announced energy price freeze is a Communist plot. The shouting does seem to irritate the Labour leader. Cameron says Scottish and Southern can cut bills because the government reduced costs. "What a contrast with the doubling of the gas bills when Labour were in power," Cameron says.
12:04 – Miliband has his head down more often than not. He's making a shaft of it, but seems as if he'd rather be somewhere else. Why was a price freeze wrong a few months ago but right now? Cameron mocking thanks Miliband for the opportunity to demonstrate how successful his long term plan is. Miliband counters that OBR says energy prices are rising by double the rate of inflation. "Shouts of 'weak' at Miliband."I'll tell you what's weak – not standing up to energy companies," Miliband says. Is it the PM's policy that we should freeze bills?
12:06 – "I'll tell you what's weak. Weak is having no economic policy," Cameron says. He quotes Scottish and Southern saying they don't like Miliband's policy. That will not displease Labour. Miliband:"He's not the prime minister at all. He's the PR man for the energy company." Good response. "A price freeze is workable and it will happen under a Labour government."
12:08 – Isn't it true living standards are falling for the first time since the war? Cameron: "Finally, after a week, we get the response to the Budget." He asks why Labour opposed the rise in the personal allowance or giving pensioners the right to spend their money as they choose? Not sure they did that. "Not a clue about how to help working people, or how to run the economy, and not a clue about the Budget." Miliband: "Not for the first time, calm down dear. Or should I say for the benefit of the chancellor: 'eyes down dear'." I guess that's a bingo joke. I certainly didn't get it.
12:10 – This is very loud. Cameron continues to defend his record, albeit more convincingly than usual. "He will go down as the PM who cut people's living standards," Miliband said. "He will always stand up for the wrong people." There actually wasn't a question there. They've given up all pretence. Cameron gets up and shouts out his election slogans. Hugely dispiriting. "He is flailing around, a man with no plan and increasingly no future."
12:12 – That was quite an unpleasant ending, not helped by the roar of approval from Tory backbenchers. Anyway, snap verdict: Cameron: 2 Miliband: 1.
12:13 – Stephen Pound (Lab, absurdist) asks if Cameron will disassociate himself from the Tory bingo poster from Shapps. Cameron thanks him for promoting their Budget policy. "I'm sure the gentleman opposite enjoys a game of bingo, it's the only time he ever gets close to Number 10." OK. That was a good line. Prepared, but a good line.
12:15 – Miliband should be concerned that he is failing to score a win when addressing what is supposed to be his core issue – and the one where he is on the side of public opinion. Cameron held him to at least a draw, but he was bolstered by the enthusiasm from the benches behind him and Miliband's difficult week since the Budget. The Labour leader can't afford a losing streak. He'll need to bring better game next week and diversify the three or four attack lines he relies on.
12:18 – "It's good to see the shadow chancellor gesticulating in favour of his leader now, he'll be outside in a minute briefing against him," Cameron says. He's on good form today.
12:21 – Mel Stride (Con, great name, not great everything else) celebrates the jobs in his constituency as a way into the whips notes which he reads out basically word for word. Long term plan and all that, although whether it helps his long term plan for his career remains to be seen.
12:24 – David Burrowes (Con, makes average look exceptional) does some immigrant bashing and celebrates his government's… wait for it… long term economic strategy. It's PMQs bingo everyone and I'll be damned if you haven't ticked them all off. Angela Smith (Lab, hugely whiney) asks something about repealing something but it was like someone in a far away room was scratching a blackboard. I caught none of it. Ah – it's the Hunting Act. Labour MPs ask about this every week. "I don't think there'll be government agreement to go forward." That was interesting. I think Cameron basically admitted that the Lib Dems have blocked his efforts for a free vote on repealing the Hunting Act.
12:29 – Ok, and with that I am going to close the live blog down. Sorry – I have to dash off. I'll make up for it next week with even more cynicism and barely-concealed existential despair than usual. See you then.
