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PMQs as-it-happened

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10:20 With Gordon in Washington it falls to Harriet Harman to run the session this week, presumably facing up against William Hague. We’d usually follow this with some tired suggestions about why it’s not her opposite number, Theresa May, rather than the shadow foreign secretary asking the questions. But we’re all aware now that it’s because he’s funnier. Labour strategists will be slightly nervous at her appearance. She’s usually a dab hand at this sort of thing but her comments on the Andrew Marr show over the weekend seemed to suggest her leadership aspirations were overshadowing her caution. Hopefully there’ll be more of that today, but don’t count on it. With two weeks passed since the last PMQs – due to the death of David Cameron’s son Ivan last week – there’s a lot of ground to cover. But it would be surprising if Sir Fred Goodwin’s pension didn’t rear its head at some point.

12:00 – Off to a slightly late start today – but it’s packed as usual. Vince Cable, incidentally, is up for the Lib Dems. Harman stands and reads the names of British personnel killed in Afghanistan this week and the last. When she says the prime minister is in the US, MPs shout ‘hear hear’. Quite what there is to cheer there is beyond me. Keith Vaz stands to ask when the government will clamp down on video game violence. Harman says the government will take action on various fronts.

12:04 – Hague gets up. He adds his horror at the Pakistani cricket attack yesterday to his statements on British death in Afghanistan. He says that if we send more troops to Afghanistan, as president Obama is asking, we will need more helicopters and logistical items to support them. Harman agrees with his statements on the attack on the Sri Lankan cricketers. The UK is working closely with Pakistan to combat terrorism, she says. “We obviously agree about Pakistan,” Hague replies and turns to the economy.

12:06 – Will she confirm the government’s loan guarantee scheme is not yet operational and hasn’t given a single loan. “The conditions are still being finalised,” Harman says, and adds that Hague shouldn’t give the impression that businesses have no help available to them. This is the start of a line that ends with the words ‘talking down the British economy’. Let’s hope she doesn’t go there. “The right honourable lady may wish to get off the subject,” Hague says, but that’s not good enough because the loan scheme is the government flagship loan plan, he argues.

12:08 – Will she undertake anything possible to speed up implementation of this long delayed scheme? Harman doesn’t really grapple with that one, but starts to list off – Brown style – Labour action to save the economy. Bank recapitalisation and all that follows. As she speaks, David Miliband murmurs abuse at the Tory front bench. “They would do nothing,” Harman ends. Hague says the jobs recruitment scheme, the mortgage support scheme, asset bank securities scheme, and Lloyds Bank deal have all been delayed. “Why doesn’t she step in?” he asks. “When Chamberlain lost his party’s confidence, Churchill stepped in. This could be her moment. While the prime minister is away will she step in?” Harman’s response is priceless: “He’s raised the very important issue of mortgage support.” MPs laugh heartily. Actually mortgage support just got in the way of his leadership jibes, which was the real function of the question.

12:12 – “Whilst he focuses on political gossip, we focus on Britain’s future,” she ends. “She shouldn’t describe her leadership campaign as political gossip.” Very funny indeed, and a little devastating. Will she recognise past mistakes? She has been overruled on Royal Mail, and clamped down on on Sir John’s pension, but she can still apologise for the government’s past actions, Hague argues. Whose side is she on? – the chancellor, who wants apologies, or Brown, who doesn’t. Hague is doing a rather good job of running rings around her, and making the government look horribly split.

12:15 – Harman’s response is competent. If the government has lessons to learn, she argues, then the Tories do too. They fought all attempts at regulation, including on mortgages. She quotes Hague as leader, back in the day: “As PM I will make deregulation one of my top priorities. I will promote minister not on the basis of whether they regulate enough, but whether they deregulate.” Hague jokes that at least he didn’t name a government department after deregulation. He finishes: “The people who got us into this mess can’t be the people to get us out of it.” Harman responds by again criticising the Tories on their concentration on “political gossip”.

12:17 – Vince Cable is up. Harman understands pensions and law. Instead of making a new law to get Sir Fred’s pension back, why doesn’t the government use exiting legislation which can take pensions away for gross negligence. Harman says there will be an investigation into whether it was discretionary and whether the people who made the decision had all the information. Cable: “The minister is missing the point.” It’s not the amount, it’s that it was paid at all. Cable then attacks on lavish public sector pensions, including that of minister. Harman says “we do recognise that concern,” and then links it to financial services industry. She’s asked the Walker commission and financial services authority to look into improving the remuneration regime. William Hague, she mentions damagingly, earned £30,000 off RSB for two after-dinner speeches. Massive noises and anger and laughter. That was very interesting, although it may have been braver to say it when he had a chance to respond.

12:22 – Another Tory mentions another scheme which has stalled – the trade credit insurance scheme. Harman accepts it is important and says work is going on. The Tories have a choice, apparently: say to your constituents that nothing can be done or work to support businesses and bring scheme’s forward.

12:26 – An effective attack from a Tory backbencher linking the need for Post Office privatisation to the EU postal legislation, which forced Royal Mail to divest itself of its most profitable business. Conservatives sleep well for weeks when they manage to attack the EU and divide Labour in one sentence.

12:28 – Who nominated Sir Fred for a knighthood and why? It was because of the Prince’s Trust, not his work in banking, Harman says, somewhat uncertainly.

12:29 – Apparently, electronic identification of sheep will soon become mandatory. There’s laughs, but he says many will find it unaffordable and that it will put some farmers out of business. Harman says identification is vital as part of disease control. Remarkable. They even want farm animals to carry ID cards. There’s just no stopping them.

12:33 – And with that, the session ends. Victory to Hague, although Harman faced off his onslaught far better than Brown would have done. If she’d introduced that after-dinner speaking point during their exchange she could have even beaten him. See you next week.