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PMQs as-it-happened

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11:00 – One hour until prime minister’s questions begins. Parliament is all a flutter today with the four bankers giving more evidence to the Treasury committee in Portcullis House this afternoon. They should be nervous. With most reviews giving the MPs a lukewarm rating over their criticism of the four men yesterday, the committee members may be looking to make the bankers bleed today. Over in the House of Commons, Gordon Brown and David Cameron will be engaging in their weekly shouting match. There’s a strong chance Cameron will focus on the role of Sir James Crosby, the man Brown appointed deputy chair of the Financial Services Authority (FSA), who faced some pretty damaging accusations from Paul Moore, former head of regulatory risk at HBOS, during yesterday’s Treasury committee session.

11:45 – That chance just got stronger, given that Sir James just resigned from his FSA position a couple of minutes ago. Brown could be in real trouble today.

12:00 – The room is crammed as usual, but there’s a tinge of expectancy in the air today. politics.co.uk‘s lobby journalist is mingling around parliament trying to pin MPs down to find out what they think of the resignation. The first question is about Sir James, calling for a proper investigation. “These are allegations he will wish to defend, so it is right he stepped down,” Brown said.

12:02 – “They can even plant questions at short notice,” Cameron says, referring to the first questioner, who gave Brown a chance to address the topic in a favourable way. Brown responds to Cameron’s much less friendly contribution by saying the KPMG investigation found the allegations to not have a firm basis. He tries to turn it into a regulation issue, mostly because Tories always oppose regulation.

12:04 – Cameron gleefully points out that the PM knighted him and relied on him for advise. Is he still a prime ministerial adviser? Brown says Crosby only did two reports and “is no longer an economic advisor to the government and has only been so in the context of producing two reports”. Brown is surprisingly on the ball today, describing the debate as a trivialisation of serious matters. Cameron indicates that at least Crosby was decent enough to resign. “Wasn’t it a misjudgement to appoint him to those roles?” Cameron asks.

12:06 – This is fascinating stuff, because it appears to be entirely unrehearsed – all taking place at the heat of the moment. Brown lists a bunch of policies the Tories opposed and says Cameron should answer to the House himself. He doesn’t usually do this, but Cameron plays his game, and lists Labour policies the Tories opposed which were a bad idea – stuff like VAT. “Who set up the regulatory system that has so failed?” Cameron asks and the Tories, in a sort of shoddy, half-hearted unison, shout: “He did.”

12:08 – Cameron uses up his Crosby material and start to comment on Ed Balls’ claims that the recession will be the worst for a hundred years. Brown ignores that and defends his policies. He quotes Obama…. once again. Cameron takes the VAT bait. The Dutch and the Germans both say it’s a bad idea, as does the French president, who said the PM is “ruining the British economy”. Brown replies: “The one person he didn’t mention who supported the VAT rise is the shadow chancellor.” Not too bad. Brown should be fully relieved Cameron let go of the Crosby angle.

12:11 – “The PM just can’t gets his facts right,” Cameron says. Ken Clarke voted against the VAT cut. Cameron continues in a jovial and embarrassingly funny way. The embarrassment comes from the fact I occasionally find myself laughing. Hague, Osborne and May are chuckling away like dolls on the front bench. Brown savages Cameron for spending the last two years calling for deregulation. It’s a massive piece of hypocrisy, quite frankly. The sparring ends but Tory MPs shout ‘more’. The Speaker is having none of it, obviously.

12:13 – Nick Clegg: Since the Queen’s Speech the government has made an average of three announcements every day. Dear God. How many are actually being put into practise? He asks. Brown does a little jig about helping businesses. He ignores the obvious thrust of the question. Some examples Clegg mentions – getting banks lending again, stopping bonuses, creating 100,000 new jobs. Nothing on any of these. “It’s bad being a do nothing party. Isn’t it even worse to be a say everything, do nothing prime minister?” Clagg asks, rather pleasingly. He also managed to get both Tory and Labour MP trying to shout him down. When a Lib Dem manages that, he’s doing good work.

12:16 – It’s hard to find new words to describe the sheer lethargy on the Labour benches every week. Quite simply, they look like they are on the way out. Darling is like some sort of Satanic cat, staring blankly ahead in a mildly malevolent manner. Alan Johnson is wearing the kind of expression which gives nothing away beyond the fact he’s definitely not paying proper attention to proceedings.

12:19 – Jack Straw pouts lazily, stares at his shoes and endlessly licks his lips. Brown asks Darling for a pen. He doesn’t have one. The message is passed down the line of the front bench. Seriously, who comes to PMQs without a pen?

12:20 – On banking policy and anti-recession strategy Brown says the Tories should be “supporting us, not criticising us”. He needs a civic lesson. A Labour question on how damaging the snow last week was to London, allows Brown to link the buses stopping with what Britain will look like if the Tories get in a cut local services.

12:22 – One honourable exception to the Labour rule. Andy Burnham, culture, media and sport secretary, sits bolt upright, paying what looks like careful attention and wearing an inquisitive look. He won’t go far.

12:24 – When all is said and done, Brown is somewhat improved from the last few weeks. He’s addressing questions – perhaps not perfectly, but far more successfully than recently. He appears on top of the material, and the fast pace of events in parliament has forced him to think on his feet. Funnily enough, it provokes a far more cogent performance from him. When he’s prepared he appears stilted and fake, desperately trying to parrot out a series of pre-prepared statements.

12:27 – The final questions are on the environment, prisons and, after a couple of MPs don’t appear when called, one on lobbying from Gordon Prentice, which Brown claims to be doing something about. One wonders if government action will be as radical as Mr Prentice would like. And the session comes to an end. Another victory to Cameron but a substantially improved performance from the prime minister.